Quotes

Quote 160 of 521

Whom can I talk to?  Get advice from?  No one.  A psychiatrist is the
God of our age.  But they cost money.  And I won't take advice, even
if I want it.  I'll kill myself.  I am beyond help.  No one here has
time to probe, to aid me in understanding myself ... so many others
are worse off than I.  How can I selfishly demand help, solace,
guidance?  No, it is my own mess, and even if now I have lost my sense
of perspective, thereby my creative sense of humor, I will not let
myself get sick, go mad, or retreat like a child into blubbering on
someone else's shoulder.  Masks are the order of the day--and the
least I can do is cultivate the illusion that I am gay, serene, not
hollow and afraid.  Someday, god knows when, I will stop this absurd,
self-pitying, idle, futile despair.  I will begin to think again, and
to act according to the way I think ...

Sylvia Plath.  Journal, November 3, 1952.
		   Agenda, 7 May 2000, p. 4

Tags: creativesense senseofhumor solace psychiatrist despair masks illusion guidance perspective god money