How to win the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest: “Excepting first names, only nine proper nouns have ever appeared in a winning caption: Batmobile, … gulfstream/2450
predictions of console unit sales. This is ridiculous. There is no way in hell to predict that by the end of 2004, for example, Sony will have … gulfstream/444
"Dear Prudence", the last question: is this not a ridiculously overwritten? ("If the measure of love is loss ...") Why does the advice giver, … gulfstream/663
One hell of a kill switch: to discourage a secondary “grey market” for that (much-hyped) $100 laptop, “the machine is disabled if not connected … gulfstream/1882
“A malaise set in within a couple hours of my arriving. I thought getting a job might help. It turns out I have a lot of relatives in Hell, and, using … gulfstream/2181
The fact that I beat a drum has nothing to do with the fact that I do theoretical physics. Theoretical physics is a human endeavour, one of the higher … quotes/410
Q: Is there a good way to tell a girl you have a really big cock before you have sex with her? A: Be like, "You all right if I have an anaconda, yo?" … quotes/338
What do I remember from making the movies? I remember that iron bikini I wore in "Episode VI": what supermodels will eventually wear in the seventh ring … quotes/144
The Jets won on Sunday, and the Giants won on Sunday. Pretty impressive. Coincidentally, Sunday, the temperature in hell was 32 degrees. -- David Letterman, … quotes/115
Tell Guiterman he not only go the statue cleaned up but the word `hell' in the _New York Times_, which is a much greater accomplishment. -- from a memo … quotes/76
By the way, do you ever read the Bible? I suppose not very often, but I had the occasion to the other night and believe me it is a lesson in how not … quotes/27
All that crap they have in cartoons in the _Saturday Evening Post_ and all, showing guys on street corners looking sore as hell because their dates are … catcher/23
I remember I asked old Childs if he thought Judas, the one that betrayed Jesus and all, went to Hell after he committed suicide. Childs said certainly. … catcher/14
I'm a sort of an atheist. I like Jesus and all, but I don't care too much for most of the other stuff in the Bible. Take the Disciples, for instance. … catcher/11
The thing is, most of the time when you're coming pretty close to doing it with a girl --- a girl that isn't a prostitute or anything, I mean --- she … catcher/10
HARTMAN: Where in hell are you from anyway, Private? COWBOY: Sir, Texas, sir! HARTMAN: Holy dogshit! Texas! Only steers and queers come from Texas, … jacket/4
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